


Dugeun Dugeun

by bokuwakero



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Angst, F/F, Fluff, lapidot - Freeform, some implied PearlRose
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-23
Updated: 2016-07-28
Packaged: 2018-07-16 21:17:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 11,551
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7285090
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bokuwakero/pseuds/bokuwakero
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>From Korean, Dugeun Dugeun ( 두근두근) (n.) – the sound of a heartbeat – often indicates a person feeling intense emotions of romantic nature.</p><p>Lapis' impredictability drives Peridot crazy, but they seem to be getting closer from living in the barn together, especially after all the bonding moments they've been experiencing as of late.</p><p>This used to be a one-shot that was turned into a multichapter. Previous name: Mamihlapinatapai.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Mamihlapinatapai

**Author's Note:**

> From Yaghan, Mamihlapinatapai: (n.) a look shared by two people, each wishing that the other would initiate something they both desire but which neither wants to begin.
> 
> I've been reading too much Lapidot and I thought of writing something as well, since I'm in the mood.
> 
> Here Lapis and Peridot are curious about what kissing feels like and they end up trying on each other. 8)  
> This happens kind of by the time Lapis starts living in the barn with Peridot.
> 
> EDIT: Per request this was turned into a multichaptered fanfic. I had a few ideas and decided to mash them up together. I'm posting the second chapter immediately so whoever has read the first chapter can jump ahead to the second. Enjoy!

The sun started to set and Lapis Lazuli found her way back to the barn. There wasn’t much to be done around there after the moon showed up – everything was too dark to be enjoyable, and most animals she liked to spend some time watching went to sleep as well. So she returned to her now to be called home, gathering all the patience she could to tolerate her insufferable roommate.

The barn’s lights were off, which was odd. Peridot, like Lapis herself, liked to keep things illuminated enough to be comfortable. Was she taking one of her naps? Lapis didn’t really understand the purpose of laying down and doing nothing for a few hours, but since Peridot started spending some time with Amethyst, she took a liking for this kind of impractical activity.

However, when Lapis looked up, a light was coming from the barn loft. She flied up there, curious to see what the flickering illumination was from. There was a TV on and Peridot was sitting on the couch, eyes glued to the screen while a scene unraveled.

“What are you doing?” Lapis dared to ask, her eyes attracted to the movement on the screen as well. A couple was having a discussion apparently, but she couldn’t quite grasp the reason.

“Watching Camp Pining Hearts.” Peridot replied, unwavering.

“What’s that?”

Peridot found the remote controller and paused the show. She didn’t want to miss a second of it and an explanation would certainly draw her attention away. She looked at Lapis like she was ready to give her a class about human culture.

“It’s what they call a TV show. There is a story and humans act as the characters of it, all with the purpose of entertaining whomever is to watch. The episodes usually last an hour or so. This one is about a Camp in which…”

She went on, but Lapis stopped listening. She glared at the TV screen: now the couple had stopped fighting but merely because Peridot paused it.

“That’s ridiculous.” She interrupted Peridot’s excited blabbing about how the characters fit well together and the setting was perfect.

“W-What…?” The smaller one frowned, losing immediate track of what she was talking about after the other gem’s demonstration of ignorance. “How can you say that if you never watched it?”

“The mere idea of sitting in a couch staring at a screen for so long makes me sick. Don’t you have anything better to do?”

Peridot scoffs. “Like what? Watching frogs jump into the lake, like you do all day? This is a much better use of my time as it helps me study human behavior and their relationships. You can stay with your frogs all you want, but leave me alone with my own activities.”

Said this, Peridot grabbed the controller again and unpaused the show. The discussion went back on. Lapis remained stoic at the other gem’s words, however, her interest was picked despite her not wishing to admit. Hesitantly, she took a seat beside Peridot, embracing her own legs and staring at the screen as well.

She couldn’t really understand what was going on – especially ‘cause she didn’t know the characters and the plot didn’t seem to make much sense. But she stayed there, as there was nothing better for her to do.

She was beginning to get really bored and her eyes began diverging from the screen, until something picked her interest back. Two of the characters had their faces together, mouths glued to each other, practicing movements she’d never seen before. Her face went from disgust to curiosity.

“W-What are they _doing_?” She questioned.

“They’re kissing.” Peridot answered, looking extremely amused by the scene.

“What’s that?”

Peridot takes a deep breath, as if about the begin another lecture.

“Well, Steven told me that when two people like each other, um, romantically, they proceed with this human ritual in order to demonstrate their affection to each other.”

“That looks… gross.” Lapis concluded, grimacing.

“I guess, but you get used to it. They do it a lot in this show.”

Silence proceeded to take place as they watched the scene. It got progressively more intimate, and the dialogue that happened was very redundant. Lapis looked at Peridot from the corner of her eye and noticed that she seemed to be getting uncomfortable, as if wishing for the scene to be over.

“I…” Lapis began. “I wonder what that feels like.”

Peridot looked at her as if seeing her there for the first time.

“Uh… me too.”

They stared at each other for a few more seconds, unsure of what to say next. The kissing scene was over, but the characters remained on the screen, talking and discussing matters of the Camp. Peridot wasn’t even paying attention to it anymore, as the atmosphere was suddenly heavy between her and Lapis.

“Do you wanna try it?” Lapis asked, looking deadly serious.

Peridot’s eyes widened as she got alarmed by the question. It was like Lapis read what Peridot had in mind, but didn’t want to say.

 “W-What?! I- I mean-”

Lapis rolled her eyes and chuckled. “I’m kidding, you idiot. I would never want to do that with you.”

Blushing, the green gem began feeling a little bit disappointed. She told herself it wasn’t disappointment: she was offended. How dared her treat Peridot like that?

“Well, that’s good! ‘Cause I wouldn’t want to do that with you either!” Peridot nearly shouted at the other gem, crossing her arms angrily and staring back at the screen. She wasn’t even paying attention to it anymore, she kept wondering what it would feel like. Steven said you were supposed to do it with someone you liked, so it felt wrong doing it with Lapis Lazuli. However… it’s not that _she_ didn’t like her, more like the other way around.

They watched the show silently for a few more minutes, but Lapis kept thinking about the kissing scene. If humans did it as often as Peridot said, then there should be a reason, right? It did _look_ pretty gross, but what did it _feel_ like? She caught herself staring at Peridot. There wasn’t anyone else there for her to take her curiosity on, and in fact, there wasn’t anyone she liked enough to want to do that with. She liked Steven, but she was sure he wouldn’t agree with that if it was such a big deal to his culture as previously stated. Then there was this annoying gem sitting by her, who was just as curious and could work as an experiment.

Peridot caught her look and felt her cheeks turning bright pink. She tried to guess, with no success, what the blue gem might be thinking, but her own thoughts clouded that process.

“W-What are you looking at, clod?!”

Lapis turned herself to Peridot and took her hand to hold her cheek. She felt her own heartbeat running faster than usual as her face got closer to the other gem’s. She licked her lips and stared at Peridot’s tiny mouth, unsure of what to do next. Closing her eyes, she overcame the inches between them and their lips touched. It felt strange and awkward at first, but after a few seconds of contact, it wasn’t so bad.

Peridot felt like her heart was going to explode from her chest. That was so absolutely contradictory! Lapis had just said she didn’t want to do it with her, so why was she suddenly so close and why did her hand burn on Peridot’s cheek with such intensity?!

Up until now their lips were just touching, but Lapis suddenly began moving her mouth, imitating the scene from the show. Peridot slowly felt more comfortable with it and began moving her lips as well. The ocean gem tried inserting her tongue inside the other’s mouth, but Peridot got startled, withdrawing from her and staring with a puzzled expression.

“W-What the hell was that?!” She shouted, taking her own hand to her lips. The lingering feeling of Lapis’ tongue still remained in her mouth and her cheeks were flushed to the extreme.

Lapis blinked in confusion. “I… I don’t know, it just felt right.”

“Do they use their tongues in the show?” Peridot’s eyebrows furrowed and she drowned in deep thinking, grabbing the controller and rewinding to the kissing scene.

She and Lapis stare into the screen, picking the details about how they’re moving, but they can’t quite tell if there is tongue involved in that kiss.

“I don’t know if that’s right… what do you think, Lazuli?”

“I know as much as you do. But let’s just do what feels right, it doesn’t have to be a perfect copy of what we’re seeing, right?”

“I guess…”

They look at each other again and once more, Lapis takes the lead. She grabs Peridot’s face, this time with both hands – like the actor was doing on the show – and their lips touch reluctantly. They tilt their heads a bit to each side so their noses don’t crash into each other, and Lapis tries inserting her tongue inside Peridot’s mouth again.

It takes the technician a second or two to adjust to the new sensation. Lapis’ tongue is so soft and it massages her own like two clouds touching. She dares to stick her own tongue inside the ocean gem’s mouth as well, and she’s surprised by how warm it feels.

They explore each other’s mouths and before Peridot knows it, Lapis is leaning over her, forcing her to lie down on the couch as she crawls on top of her. The technician’s breathing fastens – she wants to ask what she’s doing, but it feels so good that she doesn’t question it. Her hand moves to the back of Lapis’ neck and she pulls her closer; her tongue going as far as the other’s throat.

Lapis then bites Peridot’s lower lip, getting the smaller one to gasp. The ocean gem immediately shoves her tongue back inside the technician’s mouth, not getting her time to complain about it. It feels rough and aggressive, but Peridot feels her whole body getting warm from the treatment.

Suddenly, Lapis opens her eyes and stares at Peridot, withdrawing from her. They stare into each other’s eyes, but Lapis’ mind is back at the ship and how Peridot treated her like a prisoner.

Peridot frowns, puzzled by the abrupt interruption. “W-What is it now? Why’d you stop?”

Lapis sighs, confused. Why does she feel suddenly so close to someone who’s done so much to hurt her? She gets up from the couch and stands by the TV. She should hate this person, but now it seems like the feeling has softened a little bit? Not enough for her to stop loathing Peridot, of course, but she didn’t feel personally angry anymore. How odd. What did this human ritual do to her?

She turns her back and spreads her wings to fly away from the barn loft. She might as well spend the night elsewhere to sort these thoughts out. But she feels Peridot grabbing her hand from behind.

“Lazuli, what is it? Just talk to me, you stupid clod! I thought we were finally getting along!”

Lapis looks at her stoically.

“This changes nothing. It _meant_ nothing. I was just… curious, that’s all. Thank you for letting me use you.”

Peridot’s heart falls down to her stomach as she watches Lapis take flight and leave through the hole on the barn’s wall. The feeling of Lapis’ lips still linger on her mouth and she feels genuinely hurt by those words. What did she expect, though? She knew before and she knows it now: Lapis Lazuli hated her and those were all the feelings between them right now.

Maybe… Maybe she could change it, though? Peridot looks at the TV screen, where Percy and Pierre, her favorite characters, have a conversation and Percy holds Pierre’s hand. Or maybe this “romance” thing only happens on TV shows. She sits back on the couch and starts watching the episode from the beginning.


	2. Hoppípola

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> From Icelandic, Hoppípola (phr.) (v.) – jumping into puddles.
> 
> I spent literally all night writing this chapter, when I realized it was nearly 5AM.
> 
> Lapis doesn't know what rain is yet, so Peridot gives her a little help.

 

An entire week had passed since the kissing incident, and, on Peridot’s eyes, Lapis seemed to have forgotten completely about it. She went back to her usual routine of spending most of her time out of the barn and avoiding Peridot at all costs – which somehow drove Peridot crazy, as she didn’t know how to behave whenever they actually had to interact.

The sun had been burning all day, shining through the clouds neatly and blinding whoever looked at it for way too long. It was a pretty sight, however, to stare into the sky when the sun hid behind a lumpy white form, exhaling its brightness from behind it. Soon it’d be back and look at you like a large eye and make you look away once more.

Lapis Lazuli had been doing that all day from the top of the barn. That was a nice place to stay, she could avoid Peridot and look around in case any suspicious ship came from the sky. But… It was getting boring pretty quickly. And there wasn’t much else she could do.

After what seemed to be half of the day, clouds in the sky began to close in and hide the sun completely. They also seemed to be getting darker than what Lapis remembered, which she found odd and somehow scary. The sky didn’t usually do this, did it? What did it mean?

A very distressed Peridot ran out of the doors of the barn, pushing Lapis away from those thoughts. She saw the technician running away and before she was too far, the ocean gem called:

“Where are you going?”

Startled, Peridot turned back and looked around, running still in the same place, unable to find where the voice came from. She looked up and finally saw Lapis Lazuli at the top of the barn.

“Uh?! Ah. I, erm.” She looked slightly embarrassed to admit. “I need to see if Steven has the second reading tape* of Camp Pining Hearts’ Season 3. It’s not in the package and there is an episode that I need to watch, for it’s essential to my analysis.”

Without wasting any more time, she ran towards the direction of Steven’s house. It was going to be a long walk and somehow a waste of energy, but she definitely couldn’t proceed on her analysis without that episode. She was currently considering another person who’d be a good partner for Pierre, even though she was almost certain that Percy was her definite first option.

Lapis frowned. The green gem was absolutely obsessed with that she called a TV show. Lapis had her interest picked the last time she sat down by the technician to watch, and she remembered the scene perfectly. Two characters whose name she did not know had their faces together… kissing, as it was called. She wanted to explore more of that, but she wasn’t willing to admit, and it was out of question to sit by Peridot again and repeat the experience. She wanted to watch that scene again, as it was all she’d been thinking about for the past week.

But now Peridot wasn’t there to see her succumb. And she could just sneak into the barn and take a look at those VHSs.

After pondering for a while and watching the clouds get darker and darker, she went inside and looked at the TV on the barn loft. An episode of Camp Pining Hearts seemed to be on already, frozen on a scene in which a girl smiled at a camp flag. It made absolutely no sense to Lapis, but she found the controller and pressed a button.

Nothing happened.

She stared at the controller, unsure of what each button meant. She pressed many of them, but didn’t get any results. Suddenly, one of them seemed to have taken the machine to rewind to the beginning of the episode. She pressed the button beside it – since they were positioned close to each other, the other one should do something effective as well, right? Her assumption was confirmed when the episode began on screen. An opening sequence took place and a catchy song filled the room. It was a little bit too loud, but she didn’t know how to turn it down.

As the sequence proceeded, she sat herself at the couch and stared into the screen. The name of the show floated at the center for a few moments and-

A flash of light seemed to come from outside of the barn. Lapis’ attention was immediately dismissed and she looked around, eyes widened. As fast as the light appeared, it disappeared, and it was followed by a deafening crack. The sound sent chills over her spine.

“What…?” The word came out of her mouth before she could think of the rest of the sentence.

She flew over to the hole on the barn’s wall and looked around. Nothing seemed different. It was suddenly a lot darker than before, though, and the clouds were a tone of gray she’d never seen before.

What was that light and that noise then? Could it have been a ship from Homeworld? Or maybe some human ship? Did humans even _have_ ships? As far as Lapis knew, they were too much of an underdeveloped species to have this kind of technology. Nevertheless, the sound had been one of a war machine. She didn’t know what kind of creature could make a sound like that, so it had to be some sort of machine… right?

Just as she’d given up and turned around, another flash of light came through, followed even closer by not one, but _two_ cracks in the distance. Lapis turned around as fast as she could, but all she immediately saw, was a shiny light in the sky that made its way to the ground quickly, then disappeared.

Her mind began working at light speed. It should be a ship. It had to. However, she’d never seen that kind of attack before. Why didn’t they come down? Why were they aiming at seemingly nowhere? The clouds were too dark, so how were they able to see through them from above, in the first place? The rubies from before were in a ship that didn’t really have this kind of attack power, yet, could they be back? Did they find out that Jasper wasn’t really in… what was it? Weptune? Or something like that.

Interrupting her line of thought, a new bright light blinded her, followed by the crack and a line in the sky. It seemed to be getting closer.

Scared, Lapis went back to the barn loft. She wasn’t sure of what she should do. She’d just decided to stay in Earth! Steven convinced her of it! If whoever that was caught her there alone, they’d probably just take her as a prisoner again!

Her heart was running and she looked around, trying to find somewhere to hide. But there was nowhere. And the cracks were getting closer and closer the longer she took. A new sound was building up outside, like multiple things hitting the ground. Did that mean she was found already?! She didn’t even have time to gather courage to look at an unknown gem’s face, though. She had to hide. She had to-

Peridot came back in again, soaking wet and looked around. Lapis didn’t seem to be anywhere, and her Camp Pining Hearts episode was running on the TV up at the loft. Did the blue gem touch her stuff? Peridot felt anger build up, but she sighed deeply and closed her eyes: she shouldn’t be mad, after all, Lapis didn’t know anything about Earth. Maybe she pressed play accidentally, without knowing what she was doing.

She went up to the loft to find Lapis curled up behind the couch. Frowning, the green gem slowly stepped closer to her, meaning to touch her shoulder. But she stopped. Was Lapis… shaking?

“L-Lazuli?” She dared to ask. “Are you okay?”

Startled by the gem’s voice, Lapis turned around. Her face was covered in tears and her cheeks were slightly flustered. What a shame to be found like this – and by nobody other than insufferable Peridot! Why didn’t she seem… scared, though? Ships were just outside and she was being hunted by Homeworld as well.

Hiding her face again, she let out a helpless cry.

“I can’t let them find me!” She mumbled through her husky voice. “I have to hide!”

Peridot’s frown deepened. “Who are you talking about?”

“Homeworld, obviously! Their ships are coming! They’re going to take us back if they find us!”

“Wha…” Peridot was about to ask what she was talking about, when a new lightning illuminated the barn. The noise afterwards reminded the gem of the first time she experienced rain in the planet. The feeling of desperation from when she thought the Cluster was emerging. Lapis should be feeling the same way: except now there was no Cluster to worry about. She was reflecting her own fears into the thunders outside. “Oh! No! You got it all wrong, Lazuli.” She began explaining. “Those are not ships, those are thunders. It’s raining outside. It’s just something that happens on Earth.”

“T-Thunders?” Lapis’ face turned slightly, tears still draining down her cheeks.

“Yes!” Peridot smiled, excited at the perspective of teaching something new to her barn mate. This could be an opportunity of strengthening their bonds. “According to Steven, it rains when the water from the oceans evaporates and goes into the sky. Then clouds get heavy with water and this water pours into the ground! Isn’t it cool? I’m not so sure about how the thunders and lightning form, but they come from the sky too and it is a natural phenomenon.”

Lapis swallowed dry. She looked up at Peridot frowning.

“So… it’s not a ship?”

“Absolutely not! You don’t have to worry, nobody is coming for you. At least not now.”

Lapis sighed in relief, but she was still curled up in a little ball. Her expression had softened a bit, but she still wasn’t quite calm after her breakdown. Peridot looked at her scared face, clearly seeing herself in Lapis. They were the same: stuck in a planet they knew nothing about, terrified and… Well, Peridot had been alone, but as she told Lapis, she didn’t have to be. They understood each other perfectly and were going through the same things, they could support each other through this hard time they were having.

She smiled at Lapis, sincerely, and she held out her hand to her. “Hey, Lazuli. Let me show you.”

Frowning yet again, the blue gem’s eyes wandered from Peridot’s smile to her tiny hand. She felt the compassion through that simple action, but she was still holding back from trusting that gem. Yet… she still reached out for her hand. Despite being afraid, she felt like Peridot was genuinely looking to comfort her. She couldn’t help but let a soft smile draw itself on her lips.

They went to the door of the barn and stood there. Lapis’ eyes widened when she realized what was falling from the sky was water. Yes, true, she wasn’t that fond of water currently, but that water seemed different from ocean water. It was still ocean water condensed, but it seemed like it had gone through a whole process of cleansing and it was different now. It had gone through a journey to get where it was now and maybe it’d learnt a thing or two on the way. Like Lapis herself.

“You see, it’s not necessarily a bad thing.” Peridot said, interrupting her flow of thoughts. “It’s all just this planet’s ecosystem working to fulfill its needs. It is indeed a waste of energy and resources, however, you have to admit it looks really pretty!”

Lapis nodded, staring at the rain in awe. Once Peridot opened her mouth again to say something, however, a lightning stroke and the sound of the thunder startled the blue gem. Lapis jumped behind Peridot, her arms around the gem’s shoulders, trembling a bit.

Peridot didn’t frankly know how to react to that. She felt strangely comfortable with Lapis’ embrace, but she felt like the other was the one who needed to be comforted. She meant to turn around and hug her as well, but as fast as she moved, Lapis had already withdrawn from her.

“I-I’m sorry.” The blue gem said, not looking into Peridot’s eyes. Her cheeks looked a bit flushed. “I didn’t mean to do that.”

Peridot nodded, unable to produce any responsive sounds. Instead, she looked at the rain and had an idea.

“Okay, Lazuli, I’m going to show you how harmless this is!” She pointed, smiling to herself.

Said this, Peridot ran into the grass field, yelling and spinning and jumping around as the water wet her hair and glued it to her face. She wanted to look like she was having fun, just like Steven did when she stepped into the rain for the first time.

Lapis took a step forward, still inside the barn. Hesitantly, her hand approached the dripping water and recoiled once a drop fell on her fingertip. She felt its texture, rubbing her thumb against her index finger. It was really water, however, it did feel different than ocean water. And she could appreciate that feeling: this water drop had traveled from the sky to the ground.

The blue gem took a step into the rain, feeling now all these drops of water on her, draining from her face and soaking her dress. It was somewhat relieving, like a cleansing bath. Being in contact with water again after all those months with Jasper in the bottom of the ocean… it didn’t feel nearly as disturbing or suffocating as she previously thought.

Excitement grew within her chest, stirred by each singular raindrop that met her skin like a peace pact. She accepted the rain around her, turning on her heels. She ran through the field as well, joining Peridot as she jumped into puddles. They splashed water against each other like two children playing outside. Lapis managed to use her abilities to get all the water from a puddle to fall on Peridot’s head. The green gem seemed a bit irritated at first, but after seeing Lapis burst out laughing from her reaction, a chuckle grew into a larger laugh from her chest.

“I will get my revenge, Lazuli!” She yelled, jumping into a puddle next to the blue gem and slipping through the mud. She stumbled into Lapis, resulting on them both falling down on the ground on top of each other.

Peridot raised her head from Lapis’ chest and their eyes met. The smaller one knew she should get up before Lapis got angry at her – which was of her character. But she couldn’t manage to move. Their gazes were magnetically, hypnotically glued. Lapis did not get mad, she was immersed in the same awe as the other gem, and they stared into each other’s eyes for what seemed to be an eternity.

Their faces were inches from each other’s and Peridot felt her heart race in her chest once she realized it. Her glare moved away from Lapis’ eyes, down to her lips, and she wondered if… if she closed her eyes and drew herself closer… What if…

Scoffing and giggling in discomfort, Lapis stared at Peridot curiously. “What are you doing?”

The green gem’s eyes widened and she stood up at light speed, her heart now beating faster than the raindrops fell on the ground.

“N-NOTHING. I. AM GOING BACK. TO MY ANALISIS.”

She turned away and ran back into the barn, finding a towel and drying herself up. She didn’t even manage to get the “reading tape” from Steven, given it started raining. She’d have to wait until the next day to continue her analysis, but she could manage to make herself look busy to Lapis while…

“Hey. Peridot.” The voice came from right behind her and she jumped in place, startled. She felt Lapis’ soaked hand on her shoulder, forcing her to turn back to face her. The gem was smiling, which was rare – and also looked really nice. “Thank you.”

“You’re w…”

The next thing Peridot knew was that Lapis was even closer than before. Lapis’ lips felt cold from being exposed to the rain for so long, but the longer they lingered on Peridot’s own, they got warmer and smoother. Just as quickly as they approached her, however, they were withdrawn, and the feeling of cool rainwater remained as a memory and as proof that it wasn’t Peridot’s imagination.

“I… I think that’s what you wanted.” Lapis said, trying unsuccessfully hide her flustered cheeks by looking away. “It’s… not gonna happen again, though.”

Still staring in awe and confusion, Peridot nodded silently. Right now, she didn’t mind if it didn’t happen again. It _had_ happened in the first place. That’s what was really important.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *a reading tape is a VHS in Peridot’s sophisticated language I guess


	3. Forelsket

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> From Norwegian, Forelsket (n.) – the euphoria you experience when you’re first falling in love.
> 
> Peridot is confused and goes talk to someone who might have the knowledge to help.

Obviously, it was a lie that she didn’t care if it didn’t happen again. She did care, and she cared a lot. She spent the entire night thinking about every moment Lapis’ lips touched her own and how the blue gem was an absolutely unreasonable creature for saying she hated her and then kissing her. Peridot needed to talk to someone about it; she selected the individual who’d probably be more helpful on that matter and now she was walking up to the Temple.

The sea always brought back memories, not only for Lapis Lazuli but also for Peridot. For the latter, it brought memories of the way she treated the other gem, how Lapis ended up being trapped underwater because of her. The reason why she hated her so deeply. It brought her memories of the day they defeated the Cluster, and how Garnet brought Lapis unconscious in her arms. She looked so fragile and innocent, so worthy of protection…

Now, she had proven to be stronger than she appeared. The way she managed to knock down the rubies’ ship gave Peridot chills and not only for the look on her face as she did so – that look gave away dominance and confidence, two things Peridot struggled with. Seeing them so clearly on Lapis was even… attractive, in a way.

Her eyes diverged from the seashore. Peridot headed to Steven’s house, going up the stairs. She wondered if Lapis, back in the barn, was touching her stuff again. Because of the incident with the rain the day before, Peridot forgot to ask – actually, it didn’t even seem like the moment to ask something like that anymore, not after Lapis had been so nice with her.

Suddenly, she stopped before the door. Should she… knock? It had been a while since she was here for the last time, and despite having lived in the bathroom of that house for quite a while, it didn’t really feel like home anymore. Had it ever felt like home in the first place? She decided to knock just in case, she would feel like an intruder if she just walked in.

It didn’t take long and Steven was at the door, the largest of the smiles on his face. “Peridot! What a nice surprise!”

Steven invited her in and she did, hesitantly looking around. The house didn’t change in the slightest bit. There was a pile of waffles with whipped cream and strawberries – they were probably out of popcorn – on the top of the kitchen counter and Amethyst was lying on the couch, eyeing the dish with hungry eyes.

“Yo, P-Dot! Whaddup?” The other gem said, not taking an eye away from the counter.

“Hello, Amethyst.”

“Peridot, what are you doing here? Is everything okay at the barn?” Steven asked, looking somewhat apprehensive. “I hope everything is okay between you and Lapis?”

“Ah. Yeah, everything is okay. More or less. I wanted to ask you, do you have the reading tape of Camp Pining Hearts season 3? The second one. It wasn’t in the package.”

Steven frowned and thought hard. “I might have… Give me a minute or two and I’ll find it for you.”

The boy ran up to his bedroom, beginning to look into his belongings. Meanwhile, Peridot went up to Amethyst.

“Hey, um. Do you know where Pearl is?”

“I saw her walk into her room a few hours ago. She must be repolishing her swords for the millionth time or something. Why ask?”

“Well- I- um- need to talk to her.”

“I got yer back. Follow me!” Amethyst leapt from the couch and they went on the direction of the warp pad.

Beyond the warp pad, there was the huge door to the Crystal Gems’ rooms. Peridot’s eyes widened. Was she going inside? The feeling was both terrifying and amazing at the same time. Like she was being told a deep and precious secret.

Amethyst’s gem began shining on her chest and the door was divided in two by a single curved line from top to bottom. Peridot took a last look at Steven: he should be busy for a while.

They walked in and Peridot wasn’t surprised that Amethyst’s room was a mess. There were piles of junk literally everywhere, and the room extended to beyond the eye could see.

“Welcome to my crib. You likey?” Amethyst waved on a general direction.

“Where did you get all of this stuff?” The green gem asked, a little disturbed by a few of the things she saw.

“Decades of accumulating. I have some real nice shit in here, look at this!” Amethyst grabbed a large rectangle of glass. Inside it had some rocks and fake plants. “It’s an aquarium, I had fish in it once but… I kinda forgot to feed them.”

“What is the purpose of having fish in a glass box?”

“Um. To some people they’re, like, pets.”

“Pets?”

Amethyst narrowed her eyes and turned her back to Peridot. She wasn’t in the mood for that. “I’ll explain to you later. Let’s go get Pearl.”

Peridot followed her through the labyrinth of junk piles to the point she didn’t know how to go back to the door. They stopped by a puddle on the ground, by one of the tallest piles of all. Peridot spotted an archaic-looking computer, a tire wheel and an oddly-shaped frying pan. Those piles did not seem to have a system at all.

“Ta-daa. Here we are.” Amethyst said, doing jazz hands.

“Where _are_ we?”

“Jump in there for Pearl’s room. I suggest you climb up that big pile and jump from there, that’s the fun part of it.”

“No, thanks. I guess I’ll just do it from here.”

“Your choice, bud. See ya.” Amethyst began walking away towards a seemingly inactive electric fence.

Peridot looked terrified for a moment. Was she simply going to invade Pearl’s privacy like that? And all by herself? She didn’t know how Pearl would react to her presence, she needed a backup!

“Aren’t you coming with me?”

The purple gem looked back. “Eh? What for? It’s _her_ you gotta talk to, isn’t it?”

“Um… yes. But-”

“Then it’s none of my biz.”

Amethyst kept walking away. Once she wasn’t on Peridot’s sight anymore, the green gem turned to the intimidating puddle. She thought of what she was going to say. Probably beginning with ‘Excuse me, Pearl…’ was a good choice. She couldn’t really think of what would come afterwards, so she decided to just improvise when the time came.

She touched the water on the puddle with her foot. It didn’t seem too cold, but it would certainly give her chills. Swallowing dry, she decided to get over with it. Her tiny legs flexed and she took impulse, jumping into the puddle…

And as soon as she was in the water, she was out of it. She didn’t have a second to think of it, as she fell back in an audible ‘splash’. Peridot managed to emerge once more and she looked around, confused.

Pearl's room was a collection of waterfalls, surrounded by sweet and dazzling lights all over the ceiling, that reminded of stars. There was no complexity to it, unlike Amethyst’s room. For a second, Peridot thought it suited a Pearl, but she shook off that thought as soon as it crossed her mind.

She spotted Pearl on the tallest of the waterfals. She was graciously dancing to a pleasant melody that came from apparently nowhere. Peridot managed to swim over to the edge and grab the border of the larger waterfall. She nearly fell down, but she managed to pull herself up to Pearl’s level.

She cleared her throat. “Excuse me, Pearl…”

Startled, the dancing gem stopped her movements immediately and looked over to Peridot, frowning. The music stopped as well. “Peridot? I didn’t know you were visiting. But more importantly, how… how did you get in here?”

“Amethyst helped me.” The technician replied. “Despite the fact that I hate to admit it, I…” She sighed, changing her expression. Suddenly, she looked terrified and her voice went up an octave. “I need your help.”

“What happened?” Pearl looked suddenly concerned. “Is everything okay with you and Lapis?”

“Yes! No! I… I don’t know!” She grabbed her hair, not knowing where to start. “Some things happened and I don’t know what she’s planning. But she’s playing with me! She has to be!”

“Hold on. What happened, exactly?”

“Well.” She took a deep breath and began talking rather fast. “I wanted to know what ‘kissing’ was like and she was curious because she saw two characters doing it on Camp Pining Hearts. Then she kissed me and said it meant nothing. Then just yesterday she kissed me again. My heart goes all weird when she does that, I hate it! And it doesn’t even make any sense ‘cause she hates me! Steven said you’re supposed to do it with people you like! So why is she _doing_ this?”

By the time Peridot stopped rambling, Pearl stared at her with wide eyes. She had no idea of what to say or how the situation even come to that. She probably stared at Peridot for an entire minute before finding words again.

“Oh... I… I _really_ don’t know if I can help.”

Peridot made a face. “Pearl, I chose talking to you because I respect your intellect and your capacity to solve problems strategically.” Her voice faltered again. “ _Help me solve my problem strategically!_ ”

“Why don’t you talk to Garnet about it?”

“Despite our latest relationship development, I still feel quite… intimidated by her.”

“Amethyst?”

“She’d literally laugh at me.”

Pearl sighed. She never thought she would have to deal with this kind of situation. She looked down at her reflection on the water. Peridot was perhaps experiencing for the first time a kind of intimacy that brought people together in a beautiful way. She didn’t realize yet, but her heart ‘getting all weird’ was probably more than just fear. This brought memories back to Pearl – to which she smiled.

“Well, maybe I _can_ help. What exactly is bothering you about it?”

Peridot told her every single detail of what happened and stared at the other gem in expectation.

“It seems… like Lapis was genuinely curious at first. Then I think she didn’t know how to thank you for comforting her, so she kissed you.” She touched her chin thoughtfully. “I can’t tell if she likes you or not, but I think it’s too soon to assume she has any interest in you, especially after all that happened.”

“But is she going to do it again?” Peridot cried. “I _need_ to know so I can be prepared!”

“ _That_ is something you should ask Garnet, not me.” Pearl smiled. “But you know, that is a thing about Earth I like. Everything is unpredictable. That way you won’t ever be bored.”

“Oh my stars… What should I do?!”

“Why don’t you try talking to her? Try to understand her reasoning. The core of every healthy relationship is communication.”

“Hmm, yes, maybe…”

The technician pondered. She didn’t want to talk to Lapis about something so direct, but she might as well do it. She wanted an advice and here it was, what use was it in not following it? Besides, what bad could come from trying to talk to her?

“But tell me, how do you feel about Lapis kissing you?”

Peridot thought for a second. She looked away and her mind navigated once more to both of the times Lapis kissed her. It felt odd, but also very warm and breathtaking – otherworldly, if she had to describe. Without realizing, a sweet smile was taking place on Peridot’s lips and her cheeks flushed ever so softly.

Pearl rolled her eyes, also smiling. “Well, you don’t have to answer anymore.”

The technician snapped out of her trance. “Um, what?”

“You’re clearly beginning to develop feelings for her. It shows on your face.” She began, as she progressed, Peridot’s face became redder and redder. “I wonder how, since she hates you so much. None of her actions indicate she has further feelings for you, yet... you seem to be developing what earthlings call a ‘crush’.”

“A c-crush?”

 “Of course, I could be wrong.” Pearl shrugged, giggling ironically. “You’re the only one who can tell how you feel. And I’m not that good understanding feelings anyhow.”

Peridot thought about it. Did she like Lapis romantically? Maybe this, too, was too soon to say. And she didn’t like the idea of not understanding her own emotions.

“Pearl…?”

“Yes?”

“Have you ever… fell in love?” She asked, unsure if that was the terminology. She assumed it was, from all her Camp Pining Hearts studies.

Pearl looked at Peridot. No, she looked beyond Peridot, almost through her. The small gem couldn’t tell if she was even still in the room, for she seemed to be traveling in her own mind. Traveling maybe in time and in her memories, digging her deepest feelings back up.

Finally, a smile crossed her lips and Peridot understood.

“Well, I guess you don’t have to answer anymore.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you like this! Oh it is hard picking names for the chapters, but I love getting words with unique meanings for my fanfics.  
> I think I might be doing around 5 or 6 chapters for this, I'm not entirely sure. Let me know if you want more? I don't know, maybe I put some effort in having new ideas for it, idk.


	4. Oneirataxia

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> From Greek, Oneirataxia (n.) – inability to distinguish dreams or fantasy from real life.
> 
> Lapis watches Peridot sleep while wondering about how she feels towards her. That could either lead to something great or a disaster.

Just after Peridot left, Lapis sat at the couch and spent the afternoon watching Camp Pining Hearts. She finally understood how the VHS machine worked, yet she still didn’t know how to change the tape, so she just picked off wherever Peridot had stopped watching last time. She still didn’t understand the appeal of it, especially because she didn’t watch from the beginning, but she knew the names of a few of the characters by now.

She heard a noise from outside and immediately turned off the TV. She quickly flew outside through the crack on the wall. It was Peridot, indeed.

Peridot arrived back to the barn and went straight to the couch. She didn’t feel like doing her analysis now, given she had too much in mind, so she stared at the ceiling until she eventually fell asleep. It felt good to dissociate for a little bit, and as time passed and she practiced this “sleeping” thing, her dreams diverged more and more from her memories to form their own stories, about things that never really happened.

Lapis waited until she was asleep to go back inside again. Damn it! Now she couldn’t continue watching, or else she’d wake the technician up. Still, she sat at the couch, watching her sleep. She looked nearly harmless that way, so unaware that Lapis could kill her on the spot if she wanted to. And two weeks ago that’d be exactly her urge, but surprisingly, now… she didn’t want to.

Her feelings for Peridot were as confusing as last night’s thunderstorm. She still hated her for the things she had done, but those feelings seemed to be diminishing with time. If Steven believed in the green gem, maybe she did change after all, right? Lapis felt something on the bottom of her stomach. Fear. What if she did not change? What if she was just waiting for an opportunity to trap Lapis again? She couldn’t let that happen! She was tired of being a prisoner.

Her eyes wandered from Peridot’s sleeping face to her body. She was so tiny, even smaller than Lapis herself. It was hard not to find her attractive in a way, even though Lapis didn’t really understand what this feeling was. Back in Homeworld, finding other gems pretty or attractive wasn’t the kind of thing you admitted to anyone, not even yourself. But she was on Earth now, and as far as she could tell, this kind of thing was even encouraged among humans.

Peridot moved, startling the blue gem, who nearly stood up, ready to run and mentally preparing an excuse to why she was creepily watching the technician sleep. But Peridot was just finding a more comfortable position and Lapis relaxed back into her seat. She focused on the other gem’s face again, staring at her lips. She could almost feel them touching her own and she felt warm with the vivid memory. How could someone with such soft lips be so despicable and cruel?

Lapis hesitated, but she crawled closer to Peridot. She really looked like she was in a very deep sleep, and didn’t notice the proximity. Lapis’ face was inches from Peridot’s, their noses almost touching. The excitement of being so close, combined with the fear of being caught, made the gem’s heart race like she never felt before. She closed her eyes, leaning closer…

Suddenly, Peridot’s gem started glowing and Lapis backed off immediately. It began projecting something, a kind of movie and the gem frowned, unsure if that was an usual thing or not. Were those… memories? No. She was sure that never happened before. In the projection, Lapis and Peridot kissed again, but it seemed to be a completely different setting than any of the times it happened before.

“… Lapis.” She heard Peridot say. Lapis was almost startled again, but she was deeply asleep, and a smile lingered on her lips softly. It was the first time she called her ‘Lapis’ rather than just ‘Lazuli’.

Their representations in the projection stopped kissing. Projection-Lapis looked suddenly angry and pushed Peridot away from her, yelling at her.

‘You stay away from me!’ She said. ‘You’re a disgusting piece of shit and I hate you, Peridot! After everything you’ve done you still… you still dare looking at me in the eyes? Leave me alone, I’ll never forgive you!’

The green gem told her to wait, but before she did so, Lapis ran away through a door. Peridot followed her, but once she opened the door, it wasn’t Lapis who stood there. It was Jasper. Jasper walked up to Peridot, a malicious smile on her face. Peridot walked back slowly, but Jasper grabbed her by the neck and lifted her up.

‘You fucking scumbag.’ Jasper said. Her voice was slightly different in the projection, but it remained threatening as always. ‘They’re angry at me, because _you_ screwed everything up! You’re a disgusting traitor, Peridot.’

Actual Peridot started struggling desperately, taking her hands up to her own neck, and Lapis wasn’t sure of what to do. How was that projection affecting her? It wasn’t real, after all. But the Peridot sleeping on the couch seemed to believe it was, and her breathing got heavier as the dream progressed.

‘You know what I’m going to do with you?!’ Jasper went on, putting emphasis on every word. ‘I’ll break you to bloody pieces. You’ll be nothing but a shattered rock, with no memories or wishes. Then Homeworld will make you into one of those freaky fusion abominations and you’ll struggle to remember who you are!’

“No!” Peridot screamed, both in the dream and in reality. Tears began making their way down her cheeks, but she didn’t open her eyes: she was totally immersed in the dream and didn’t seem to find a way back. “A-Anything but that, please!”

Lapis was concerned. Wasn’t she going to wake up? She didn’t know how dreams worked, but being trapped in a fake situation like that seemed absolutely terrifying! She touched Peridot’s arm, unsure whether she was doing the right thing.

“Peridot? Peridot, wake up.”

But nothing happened. Lapis didn’t want to look at the projection anymore, but Jasper seemed to be hurting Peridot at this point. It was too much to see, but she couldn’t ignore Peridot screaming and crying like that.

“Peridot! Snap out of it!” Lapis yelled, shaking her shoulders gently.

Suddenly, the projection stopped and Peridot sat up, eyes wide open. Her irregular breathing didn’t seem to adjust and she looked around, realizing she was actually in the barn. Her gaze stopped on Lapis’ face, and she wondered if her eyes were lying to her or not. The soft hands on her shoulders let her know that now she was in reality.

More tears left her eyes, this time, of relief. She couldn’t stop crying and she threw herself into Lapis’ arms, letting all the emotional burden she carried before out through her sobbing. She buried her face on the blue gem’s neck, fogging her lens. She was so relieved Jasper wasn’t actually there to kill her! Peridot had never experienced a nightmare before, and she was surprised it could be so terrifying.

Lapis, on the other hand, didn’t know how to react to the sobbing gem in her arms. She closed her arms around her waist, awkwardly holding her. Deep inside, she enjoyed this feeling. She could feel Peridot’s accelerated heartbeat on her chest, and the breathing on her neck brought chills down her spine. It was almost as if she had power over the other gem, as if she were at her mercy, showing her most vulnerable side to whom once was her enemy.

Once.

Now Lapis felt somewhat glad to be there to comfort her. Which confused her.

“What happened?” Lapis asked her, her voice faltering a little. “You didn’t seem to wake up and you started screaming.”

“I- I was so scared!” The other gem answered, her voice muffled as she refused to raise her head from Lapis’ neck. “There was y-you and then-” She stopped. Her grip towards Lapis seemed to become tighter. “Then Jasper showed up! S-She wanted to kill me, I was so sure she was going to kill me!”

“H-Hey… try to calm down, it wasn’t real…”

Lapis pat Peridot’s back a few times, but the gem was still sobbing. She had to calm her down somehow, take her mind off that dream, drive her attention away. What if she kept on crying for the next hour? What would Lapis do? She remembered the beginning of Peridot’s dream and had an idea. She grabbed her face between her hands, forcing Peridot to look at her. She leaned over, pulling the gem into a warm, comforting kiss.

As soon as their lips touched, however, they departed. Peridot pushed her away and looked at her like she was crazy.

“W-What are you doing?!” She yelled, furrowing her brows. “Why do you keep _doing_ this?! Are you playing with me or something?”

Lapis looked at her, confused. That was the incorrect response. “I… I thought… it could calm you down… You- You seemed to like it when I did it the last time.”

“Well, yes, I liked it. But I don’t get you either, Lazuli!” Peridot scoffed. “You say you hate me, then you kiss me! Can’t you make up your mind already? Don’t make me feel like there could be something between us when you’ll just keep despising and ignoring me as soon as we’re not kissing anymore!”

Left speechless, the blue gem felt her cheeks burning. She looked down, pursuing her lips. She felt like kissing was a good way to express feelings which she didn’t have words for – like “thank you” or “I’m here with you”. But apparently, she had misinterpreted the meaning of this human ritual. Apparently, it was a big deal not only to humans, but to Peridot as well.

Standing up, Lapis turned around, spreading her wings and preparing to fly. Peridot hurried and grabbed her hand, stopping her the moment her feet left the floor.

“Stop! Stop that, too! Stop running away from me when I’m trying to talk to you!”

Lapis frowned, annoyed. “You said I shouldn’t make you feel like there could be something between us, so I won’t. Ever again. You don’t have to look at my face anymore, I’ll just leave.”

“No!”

That made Lapis even more confused. The gem’s grip tightened on her hand and when Lapis looked up, tears were rolling down her face once more. Great, so much work to stop her from crying, now she was crying again. And worse even, because of her.

“I don’t understand.” Lapis sighed.

“I don’t want you to leave, don’t you get it?” Peridot yelled. “I want you here. I want to be friends with you. I want you to like me. I want you to forgive me for what I’ve done because I used to be a major clod back then, but I changed. I changed…” She looked down at Lapis’ hand and softened her grip, but not letting go. “And if you could only let me show you that…”

Lapis thought about Peridot’s dream. About how Projection-Lapis yelled at her, telling her that she would never forgive her. Lapis didn’t want to say the same harsh words to Peridot, that would hurt the smaller gem and she didn’t want that. But she wasn’t ready to forgive her either. However, she had to admit that she had an interest on Peridot she couldn’t suppress.

Maybe she should give her a chance, after all.

Her feet touched the ground once more, but she avoided Peridot’s gaze. Her cheeks reddened as she struggled to find literally any words to fill the silence with.

“You… Do you wanna watch some of that show you like? I kind of want to understand what it’s about.”

Peridot’s face went from disbelief to absolute bliss, despite Lapis’ evasiveness. Her eyes acquired a glow Lapis had never seen on anyone’s face before, and the green gem smiled from ear to ear, like it was the most fantastic thing she’d ever heard in her entire life.

“Yes! Definitely!” The gem said. “I would love to!”

 

***

 

They were probably on the third episode of the second season, and Lapis’ eyes were glued to the screen. Peridot had been explaining everything she didn’t understand and now she finally saw why the other gem – and Steven – liked this show so much. It was indeed very well scripted, the actors did a great job, and the characters were very realistic. Lapis could feel herself becoming emotionally invested in their interpreted relationships, and she didn’t understand why she felt that way, but she didn’t mind at this point. It was a fun experience, after all.

“I don’t really like Paulette.” Lapis said at some point. “I think she’s too manipulative, like she’s not being her real self when she talks to other people. Do you think it’s just the actress doing a bad job, or she’s really a bad person?”

She awaited an answer, eyes still fixated on the screen. But when the technician didn’t respond, she looked at her.

“Peridot?”

Peridot had fallen asleep again. This time, she had a permanent smile on her face and didn’t seem to be having any bad dreams. But no projection came from her forehead gem. Lapis’ mouth drew a smile on her face as she watched her sleeping. Suddenly, that was a lot more interesting than Camp Pining Hearts.

She felt a warmth on her chest, a happiness she couldn’t quite describe. Was that… love? She’d never felt this way before, so she couldn’t tell. Lapis Lazuli leaned over, her face next to Peridot’s, then she planted a tender kiss on her cheek. She lied down beside the technician and closed her eyes. Maybe she wasn’t going to “fall asleep”, but it felt right to rest there for a bit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow I am really not sure about this chapter! I struggled a bit to write it.  
> I hope I'm giving away the feeling that they're getting closer progressively, I would hate if it seemed like they were suddenly in love. Let me know what you think ;v;


	5. Dugeun Dugeun

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> From Korean, Dugeun Dugeun ( 두근두근) (n.) – the sound of a heartbeat – often indicates a person feeling intense emotions of romantic nature.
> 
> This is the final chapter. I'm sorry it took me so long to write it, I'm ashamed, but I had a writing block and I couldn't get it done any quicker ;^; 
> 
> Thank you for reading this far and enjoy!

A pair of blue eyes opened slowly and blinked to adjust their sight to the sunlight that illuminated the barn. Lapis looked around, confused. Had she fallen asleep? She didn’t remember voluntarily doing so – although maybe that’s how it is meant to happen, when you less expect. She did not have any dreams, like Peridot seemed to have every time she dozed off, which was good, because having a nightmare about Jasper was the last thing she’d wish for – it would definitely not be pleasant at all.

Sitting straight on the couch, she noticed for the first time that Peridot was absent. That was even odder, as she didn’t wake up when the other gem left. They spent the night sharing the little space available on the couch: Lapis fell asleep on Peridot’s arms without realizing. How could the technician have untangled herself from Lapis without waking her up?

The gem shook her head and stood up, spreading her wings and flying downstairs. Only then she saw Peridot, sitting on the floor with a strange machine in hands, a few tools and a sweet smile that made Lapis’ stomach twist strangely.

“Oh! You’re finally awake!” The green gem said. “You’re indeed a heavy sleeper, but I didn’t want to turn on the TV because I was afraid you would wake up.”

Lapis ignored the commentary as she didn’t have a proper answer for it. Perhaps she should thank her for the consideration, but it seemed a bit too much. Her gaze stopped at the machine on Peridot’s tiny hands. It was shaped like a crescent moon, brown in color and had a few buttons and an audio output on the center.

“What are you doing?” She asked out of curiosity.

“I’ve been fixing Steven’s old radio.” Peridot answered, standing up with the machine still in hands. “I took three hours trying to figure out how it works, considering it’s such a primitive communicator, but I believe it is operational now. Would you like to see?”

Lapis shrugged, indifferent. Peridot smiled and took the radio to the nearest wall socket, leaving the radio on the floor and plugging it in. She knelt down and turned it on, playing with the commands a bit. After a few moments, a song, accompanied by clear static, broke the silence softly. It was an electronic sounding music, very funky and cheerful, and had a female vocal.

“Wow, it actually works!” Peridot exclaimed. “This is nice! I am finally becoming one with this world’s technology!”

Lapis stared at the radio thoughtfully. The song was so nice, she’d never heard anything like that before. In Homeworld music was not important at all – it was considered useless and it was commonly thought it distracted you from your duties. Her foot became tapping the floor along with the beat unconsciously, but once she realized, she stopped, embarrassed. Happily, Peridot wasn’t looking.

“Somehow I feel like I heard this song before. Maybe Steven was singing it or something. The lyrics are indeed familiar.” The technician looked back at Lapis. “What do you think, Lazuli? Do you like it?”

“Um. Yes, it’s okay, I guess.” She shrugged, not wanting to sound exaggeratedly excited about the music.

Peridot smiled again. She seemed to be in a very good mood today. Perhaps the conversation the night before brightened her spirits: she felt lively and glad that Lapis had finally decided to give her a chance, and she didn’t plan to waste it. That joy gave Lapis a strange feeling, like she should be excited too. Her face, however, remained stoic and apathetic.

Moments passed and the song was over. The silence between them progressed to become more and more uncomfortable. Peridot, then, remembered something he talked to Steven about just the day before. She turned off the radio just as another song started playing.

“Oh. Right.” She murmured, shyly. “Steven said there is going to be a meteor shower tonight. Lazuli, I was wondering… would you like to watch it with me?”

Lapis frowned. A meteor shower? Those were common back in Homeworld, but it was a somewhat destructive experience. However, considering the Earth was a completely different environment, perhaps this was something humans idolized. The concept was still a little strange to the gem, though.

At first she thought of refusing since the activity didn’t seem very appealing to her. She didn’t mind looking at the skies, especially when she was sitting at the top of the barn, but usually that wouldn’t be merely an appreciation of the landscape: she’d be looking for ships coming to kill her. However, she looked at Peridot’s face and was unable to refuse. The gem seemed to have gathered all the courage within her in order to invite Lapis, which made her feel some kind of empathy.

“Yes, okay.” She said, reluctantly. “But only if you turn the music back on.”

Peridot’s eyes glowed in response and she obeyed promptly.

 

***

 

The sun was setting in some beautiful shades of pink and orange that lingered inside the barn, foreshadowing the spectacle that would happen later that night and hovering over the two gems like a spotlight. Lapis was deeply entertained with human music while Peridot attempted now to fix a wall clock in the shape of a star. Steven had asked her to do this a while ago, and some pieces of it were missing, so the technician was looking inside a large box of parts in order to find substitutes.

The clock in her hands marked a quarter past two, but it was definitely wrong. As the setting sun burned her eyes, the green gem looked at Lapis, who was lying face up beside the radio.

“Hey, Lazuli. Shouldn’t we get going?”

“Where?” The blue gem asked. Her eyes were closed, but a frown took place on her forehead, as if she was irritated with the interruption of her very important activities.

“Weren’t we going out to see the meteor shower?” Peridot made a face. She did agree with that earlier, how could she have forgotten already?!

“Oh. Okay.” Lapis sat up, stretching her muscles lazily. “Isn’t it a bit early though? The sun just went down and it has to be somewhat dark to see it.”

“I’m just saying that we need a proper location first. Steven said the Lighthouse atop of the Temple is a good place to watch it from.”

“Are they going? Steven and the gems?”

“I’m not quite sure. I think they have plans.”

Lapis didn’t mind being alone with Peridot, but having Steven around always made her feel safer. It wasn’t like she didn’t spend the whole day on Peridot’s presence already – something she would’ve never done a few weeks before – so spending the evening with her someplace else shouldn’t cause her any more anxiety. In fact, it didn’t at all.

She remained indifferent to Peridot’s response, and got herself up from the floor. She dusted off her skirt and looked at the green gem. “So? Are you going to sit there forever?”

Peridot shook her head. She still didn’t believe Lapis agreed to actually spend time with her. This would’ve sounded like a crazy dream a while ago. The two of them had been experiencing quite a few bonding moments as of late, and Lapis seemed more open to it than she could expect.

The technician got herself up and they began walking together in silence. The temple was quite far so Peridot thought maybe she should find something to talk about. What did she and Lapis have in common? Besides being gems and from Homeworld (obviously), they did like the same TV show and Lapis seemed to be fond of human music too. But all those topics seemed to be a little overused at this point, except for the latter. But then again, Peridot didn’t know enough about human music to hold a conversation about it.

Lapis didn’t feel particularly bothered by the silence that took place between them, but she noticed how uncomfortable Peridot had become. She tried to think of something to talk about as well.

“So… how exactly did you first meet Steven?” She asked, regretting immediately. That was a dumb question.

Peridot seemed to like it.

“Uh, I was checking the progress in the Kindergarten from Homeworld and he appeared in one of my screens. I thought he was a human at first.” She stopped to think. “Well, he technically is. Well, not exactly. I don’t know, that is a tricky topic.”

Lapis giggled. “True, he is very unique.”

“How did _you_ meet Steven?”

“Well, I was trapped in a mirror for centuries in Earth and the Crystal Gems gave it to Steven. He found out that I was in it and helped me out.”

“How did you get trapped _in a mirror_?”

Lapis’ eyes went dark. Peridot didn’t see it at first because she was paying attention on the ground, being careful not to trip on some rocks on her way, but when she looked up at the gem, her eyes widened and she waved her hands dismissively.

“Oh! No, no! You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to!”

The blue gem nodded, softening a bit – she forced a small smile, but it was so fake it looked scary.

At that point they arrived at the bottom of the hill and Peridot looked up irritatedly. Were they really have to go up all the way? Yikes. Lapis saw her obvious grimace and frowned, wrapping her arms around Peridot’s ribcage and spreading her wings.

“What are you doing?!” The technician shouted, startled. Her face flushed instantly as she felt Lapis’ breath so close to her neck.

“We’ll go faster this way.”

“Alright, but next time ask before you do it!”

In a minute, they flew to the top and were on the bottom of the lighthouse. It was now dark enough for the stars to be seen and the light in the lighthouse was off so it wouldn’t disturb whoever wanted to watch the meteor shower. Lapis let go of Peridot, who’d remain stiff for the next five minutes.

“Okay, what now?” The blue gem asked.

“N-Now we sit here and wait.”

They made themselves comfortable, sitting on the grass and staring into the darkness of the sky. There were only stars and the moon for them to see, and silence took over once more.

“D-Did you know,” Peridot begun, “um, meteor showers are caused by steams of cosmic debris entering an atmosphere at an extremely speed on a parallel trajectory. Most of them disintegrate and never hit the surface of the planet they approach given the high temperatures they’re exposed to.”

Lapis glared at her. “Can you speak my language?”

“Ahh,” the technician blushed, embarrassed by her own use of technical vocabulary. “They’re rock fragments that hit the atmosphere really fast and dissolve into heat before hitting the ground?”

The blue gem scoffed, lying back on her elbows. “That’s better. You sound less arrogant like that. That’s one of the reasons why I didn’t like you, you know?”

“Didn’t?” The past tense didn’t go unnoticed to the technician. Her eyes were big and glowed with expectance as she observed the blue gem’s face redden with nervousness.

“Uh… yes. I-” Lapis was interrupted. Something in the sky caught her attention. “Oh! Look, it’s beginning.”

Peridot looked up. In the darkness of the sky, a shining dot began cutting through the gloom like a sword -- except, slower. It departed into many smaller fragments that glittered the night sky, gifting it with light and hope, and crafting a warm sensation within the depths of the hearts of the two gems watching the spectacle above their heads. It was a splendid, blissful feeling to watch the evening break apart like that with a person by your side.

Perhaps one could even call borderline romantic the breathtaking chaos the stars had suddenly turned into. It was all down to the cosmic coincidence that brought two people together in a heartbreakingly large universe, in which the possibilities of finding true love or true happiness are so scarce one must be content with what they have.

 Peridot’s hand traveled to her side, as an attempt to balance herself from the dizziness of these deep thoughts. Her fingers met with Lapis’ though, and they were both startled, looking at each other immediately. They shared a long gaze, staring into each other’s eyes like they’d never _actually_ done it before. The stars in their eyes were suddenly a lot more important, and the meteor shower suddenly sounded like a lot less interesting idea.

Finally, after endless seconds of a speechless conversation, Lapis smiled. A genuine smile, one that meant one of the most important things Peridot needed to hear: forgiveness. Perhaps not absolute, but that smile meant she was on the right path to it. The technician grinned in return.

They looked back at the sky, appreciating the view, and Peridot leaned her head on Lapis’ shoulder, their hearts beating in sync – _thump thump_. For the first time, everything was completely fine between the two gems.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so there's one last thing I'd like to say;; I didn't get Lapis and Peri to kiss right on the last moment 'cause I wanted the doubt to stick out: are they gonna be in a relationship? Are they in love? ~ it's a mystery ~
> 
> I'm sorry if this chapter seems a bit off, too, I had a lot of trouble writing it. I hope the quality didn't go down too much;;
> 
> Anyways please leave a comment so I know if you enjoyed it!

**Author's Note:**

> Please leave me some comments! I'd love to know what you think and I love having some feedback!


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